unfortuneatly, i have to find another place for my ideas. until that happens, NO ONE will be able to see them. sorry, NO ONE, if you are who you say you are, i have nothing to worry about.

looking looking looking, now i don't want to get up. damnit...!

i found something interesting. i typed in "Where are you" into google and Frank Sinatra's 13th album, which I have never heard of in my life popped up.

i just find it interesting that it's his 13th album for obvious reason. The title says it all: i'm not looking for you, i'm looking for "You".

you're sitting and thinking and you're not doing, John, you're NOT. DOING.

so...?

So you're gonna waste your life away.

and...? and what's wrong with that.

What is all the suffering for...?

Exactly, what is all the suffereing for...? Maybe there is no meaning to why i am here...? what if i never knew about the Master Idea what if i never knew....?

Then you would be one lost soul, you would be suffering and not knowing why...

because i wouldn't know the master idea (rhetorically)

yes, exactly.

so, who cares...? i know it now. i could live on this income for the rest of my life.

learn from the mistakes of your past lives.

right, i forgot about that.

test

Testing

yes, yess, that's it.

a 3D visualization of the Master Idea, that is interactive using the 5-tier system

That's what i'll build my next website around...

what will it be useful for...? we'll find out

dear vampirestat,

you're annoying in my stats, you're blogging them up. so could you please blog somebody else's stats up...?

thanks,

a blogger

drivebys

to the guy shouting out of the window of his car!: you have no idea who you're shouting at! thanks...! but i know who i'm shouting at: a dumbass...! haha i hope you enjoyed yourself at the expense of my existence! but if i make your day brighter just because i exist, i guess that's nothing to complain about...! at least somebody's happy...! have a good day...!

WANT A and WANT T

i think there are two different types of wants
what we think we want, and what we actually want

WANT_A
WANT_T

WANT_T is based on everything that we've actually felt through any of our senses, after birth.
i.e., we can never WANT_T something we have never felt before.

WANT_A is a powerful force that forces us to get what we WANT_A even if we are unaware of what we want. WANT_A is a want that goes along with the contancy of the Universe and it is what we have always wanted since the beginning of time, even in our past lives.

it is possible that WANT_A == WANT_T, however just because WANT_T exists doesn't mean it is equal to WANT_A, therefore WANT_T might never be realized.

furthermore, WANT_T is based only on what we've experienced after birth, so we might THINK we WANT something that gives us a feeling, but in all acutality if we ever got that feeling it is possible that the feeling we thought we wanted is a totally different feeling from what we actually get or what it actually is.

hence, we can think we want something, but thinking to want something can equal thinking to want something else, but it isn't something else because we don't know it.

the difference between want and like

there's a difference between WANT and LIKE.

the difference is, WANT means that a person will get what they are seeking.

if you WANT something, you WILL GET IT.
if you don't WANT something, you will NOT get it.

however, just because you WANT something, doesn't mean that you will LIKE the process it takes to get it.

so i WANT to get this stuff done, however, i don't LIKE the process i have to go through everyday to even start on finishing a project.

also, if someone doesn't LIKE the process it takes to get something, their body might adjust and NOT WANT what they don't like anymore.

but then there's the theory that what you WANT cannot be changed and is set at birth. so, we might THINK that we WANT something, but if we never get that something, then we never WANTED it in the first place.

so we can never NOT WANT something, because that would denote that there is a choice, which based on the theory, there isn't.

we can only GET what we WANT, although we may or may not be aware of what we actually WANT.

WANT is complex. it needs to be studied more but on a scientific terms, it can be described as a predisposition / genetics / heredity (i think) and on a more metaphysical level we have studies such as Numerology which basically say that there is a 'constancy' in the universe, that is similar to, of course we have the Master Idea to go along with that.

get it...?

need a month's supply of energy drink.

that would cost me about $80.

hmm, it might be worth it

need a freakin office

makes me angry like hulk

gonna hulk smash all this shit

where's my freakin office...?

need to build a shell

sound proof, air conditioned, with internet, only for one person, me

no groups of people talking in the background, nothing

cause other people's energy is distracting

especially when you DON'T want to do something.

whatever,

most people probably won't see it so they probably won't know about any relationship whatsoever, and most people, if they see it, they won't even think about it, but the thing is, they're taking it with them, where ever they go, whether they know about it or not...

THE POWER OF NUMBERS....!

but more specifically,

 THE POWER OF IMAGE BROADCASTING / PROJECTION (Theory)

...

that's the image broadcasting theory i'm talking about. (in other blog)

makes me angry to know that i could've done better, i could have reached my potential by now or been closer to it had these 'things' not gotten in my way.

it's like being in a cross country race where someone is holding you back by your arms.

"LET. GO. OF. ME....!"

i'm probably going to be reincarnated, if i die before i reach my potential

what was that saying,

"it is better to light a candle than curse the darkness"

how is it that a 5 with a less than 10 destiny and a 6 with a less than 10 destiny are more successful than a 1 with an 11 destiny...?

i'm not trying hard enough. 

also, i shouldn't be comparing.

there can only be 1

Today is a beautiful day outside, but when i went inside there was this big huge mother fucking fly just zooming around the library. God it's annoying. and they're disgusting too....!

a fly is the only mf from the insect world i would kill, besides a black widow.

sometimes i think flys are spies from the devil, cause... God there it is again...! AGH, annoying mf...

...cause everytime i'm doing something important or it's a nice day, a fly has to show up and annoy the f out of me. just that annoying buzzing noise "ZZZZZZZZZ"... that's when you know. it's a HUGE MOTHER FUCKING FLY

*rolls up some paper*

"There can only be ONE...!"

beginning to think that computer graphics isn't my preferred outlet.  but i can't stop now: if i don't do it, who will...? then it will never be 'materialized'...! agh! oy ve!

haha i used oy ve, and i'm not Jewish.

is that legal...?!
(okay, I looked for a meme, couldn't find one)

who leaves $56 lying on the ground in an empty parking lot...? right out in the mid open. and the thing is, i didn't have any income backing me up and i was low on money. but 56$...? come on, who does that, i almost thought someone planted it there on purpose...

this happened a while ago but still thinking about it

2 Ideas

Sorry just drank some energy drink so felt like making this pretty... haha okay

IDEA

...all this numerology stuff, it reminds me of two things.

───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────

 ■ a past thought, just maybe a split of a second: can we not

    change time...? are people's destinies decided before they

    are even born? is there a universal order...?

 ■ another past thought before i realized the Master Idea: we

     are ideas before we ever become materialized. That is,

     before i knew myself, before i will ever know anything

     about myself, the 'idea' of me already exists. my 'idea' is
     shared with other's 'ideas' so we 'know' each other be-
     fore we ever know each other: our ideas merge / share
     their compositions on a sub level that can't be detected.
     that is why some people seek out certain types of chara-
     cteristics in others and why, arguably, what we want in
     life or the relationships we obtain is something that cannot
     be changed. furthermore, because the material is based
     on an 'immaterial' realm that is always constant and 
     invariable, we can say that the basis of 'reincarnation'
     and numerology correlate with this very idea. the ultimate
     realization is knowing that if 'i' am an idea and 'she/he' is an
     idea then we both came from somewhere, i.e. the
     Master Idea... more on this later.

───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────

Do you get what i'm saying...? It might be hard because you probably don't even know what the Master Idea is. Okay, I'll explain a little in my other blog...

'it is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.'

very interesting. if / when i start writing movie scripts, this theme going in it...

Sex and Numerology

Woman to Man: so, a number 11, a number 22, and a number 33 walk into a bar...

Man: oooh yeah, sexy...

Woman: hwhat...? i was talking about Numerology you pervert...!
...

Personality Number

how did they get 33 as my personality number...? one site says it's 11 the other 33

Update:

The correct number is 33/6

Interesting Numerology stuff

Numerology for John Edward Randall, born 10/29/1987.
Ngot this from a website. My life path number is 1, my life destiny number is 11....

See why choosing the right thing is important to me. I can learn the lessons from my past lives.

DESTINY 11

“I live my visions and realize my dreams!”

Destiny 11 produces people who are sensitive, present and tuned to the feelings of others. This vibration denotes individuals who are courageous and intelligent – the great visionaries of our society seeking human progress. This destiny reveals a spirituality that is open and inclusive, different from the spirituality of 7 which can be serious, demanding and often times intolerant.

You are the worlds greatest dreamers – visionaries through time – the windows that give us access to new ideas and alternatives for a better life. This is without a doubt appreciated as long as you act upon them. If all your dreams and visions stay in a world where only you have access, they will not serve us in any way.

11 is a double vibration, it denotes a level of high intellectual power, although nothing keeps you from being good with your hands, your real potential remains your head – intellectualized. This faculty can be used for the good of humanity but in the negative it can also be used for organized crime. Be prudent. Life experiences are nothing but memories we collect through time. What memories do you want to collect? When used positively, you touch the highest cosmic vibration, in order to do so, much personal work needs to be done to achieve this, hence, begin today.

Your understanding and knowledge is indeed extraordinary, which can make you someone who knows everything. Try not to let that bother you, for that is exactly what you have chosen to do and share with us in this life time – to teach us alternative ideas followed by a sane way to evolve in light, harmony and acceptance. Remain present and realistic and avoid fantasies. This frequency of existence also gives you the ability to change faces, to separate your home problems from the office and vice versa. Since there is always two sides to everything, you may use this ability to get off from a less honest situation and/or circumstance you have created or entered. Try to use this faculty positively and truthfully, remember, the truth will always surface.

This destiny offers an extraordinary power of perception – an intuition that is strong and remarkable – well above the average. Accept that you perceive things that others don’t. This is the reason why your destiny is a master number vibration much is expected from you, not only to serve your soul’s purpose, but to share with us as well.

When Negative: You receive an energy that is double and abundant creating in you nervous tension. If you are active and dynamic you’ll serve your destiny well and will experience a life that is pleasant, productive and healthy. If instead you decide to draw back and choose an easier path, (1+1)=2, then you will experience physical and/or psychological problems. Yours is a master number destiny, remember, much is expected from you. 11s as well as 22s, the two master numbers, could retreat into a simple vibration, 2 and 4. At first it seems to be more comfortable, however, you will soon discover that that comfort is nothing but temporary.

Profession: Although more intellectual than physical, you can also excel manually, especially if your other numbers promote it. This is indeed a very diplomatic vibration and one that loves people. Professions such as, psychology, philosophy, law, politics, doctor… anything that has to do with people and deep thinking, including business and leadership fits you perfectly. Bill Clinton remains a good example of the potential of this vibration. Choose an occupation that is based on passion and dance with it.

Finances: To fully realize your financial potential you must recognize your need to take action and materialize the wonderful dreams and visions you receive. Faculties you have inherited from previous lives and are here to share them with us. Whether it is a house, a project, a computer… all begins with a thought, a dream, a vision. Expose them, and materialize what inspires you. Only then can you attain the financial success you desire and deserve.

Relationships: Just as 2s, relationships are also crucial to 11s. Your world would simply be incomplete without them. Recognize that due to the intensity of your energy, you need stimulation and activities, perhaps it would be appropriate for you to choose someone who is also dynamic, energetic and spontaneous, otherwise you may find yourself living what we call a double life. Needless to say, but this can very well bring you all kinds of complications and adversities.

Health: Due to the double energy you receive, you need to pay close attention to your health. Start by learning how to control the way you feel. You can be very sensitive, or worse, you can hide it inside. The formula here is simple; if you feel good then all is good. Keep active, remember, all that energy needs to be evacuated. Just as 7s, 11s are also a mental energy, sexuality performed with passion and love can and will fine tune your health. Sports as well as physical and mental activities are without a doubt for you the perfect prescription.

Ding dong the t.v. is dead

remember how i said that the t.v. was anoyying me...? well yesterday, on the 13th, while i was asleep, my roommates were watching t.v. and a puff of smoke came out of the t.v. and it stopped working.

kind of superstitious if you ask me, 5/13/13 the t.v. is dead! hahaha okay

need to come up with some new ideas. hmm, everything is pointing to this one idea. trying to steer off of that. it's a good idea, but i can do better.

gosh.

think i will take a stroll and try to get some inspiration...

this will be a feat if i can pull this off... but it's not just ME. it's everything before me, for thousands of years and even before that, since the beginning of the Master Idea...

i once lived in the past. it was me, but it wasn't me. i am me, yet i am everything before and after.

there is no time, only the NOW. i can neglect the responsibility of my path, and not fulfill my part, which would result in a massive (something bad). or i can rise to meet my responsibility (like Aragorn)...

We all have a responsibility.

My numerology and horoscope has been correct up to this point. Let's hope it doesn't fail me.

keep at it, keep at it, keep at it! never give up...!

Keep going: you've done too much to give up now.

i have 3 different numerologies but one horoscope, no matter what my name is. They say, or point to, that i should keep going even if I don't know why, because the hard work will pay off. Something great can come from this...! The purpose may be hidden, but i'm curious none-the-less...

trying to give up what's been holding me back in the past 8 years. at the same time, it's like, there's nothing to motivate me anymore cause i have no anger to back me up, no anger to push me, nothing. when you let go of your past

the grievances of my past are what pushed me to be better than what i am.
if i have none, what propels me anymore...?

"I must get this done, so i can show so and so that i'm better than them."

that doesn't exist anymore. why should i keep doing what i'm doing...?
...

what will i do...? i'm in a white room, surrounded by nothing.