Tuesday, January 3, 2012

You will make a difference.

John: (shouting) Everyday it's the same fucking thing! Why am I taking this God-damn medication if I can't do anything with it! (looks at Jack, pacing in his room) I only get one shot, (holds up one finger) one godamn shot a day, and if something gets in the way it's over. What am I doing? What am I doing, Jack? We have less than 365 days to get this shit done. Now I'm contemplating quiting this job that I liked so much. I'm doing worse, cause this shit is all that's on my mind.

Jack: (clears his throat) ehem. Well first I think you should seriously think about the implications of what might happen when you actually have no money. I mean, sure, right now it seems all good -

John: I've been there before. I know what it's like. You were with me, remember. I know I need this job, it's just I'm allowing something to happen, I'm allowing my time on earth to just slip away

Jack: well right now I think you are just angry that this is happening and when you are angry you make stupid decisions. I'm sure a month from now you will feel differently

John: I'm a freakin genius and I'm wasting my time acting retarded at a Restaurant!

Jack: You need that money for medication. Do the responsible thing.

John: (still angry) They all probably think I'm some retard or some shit like that. Just because I can't read the fucking order right. Now I'm in a bad mood and I can't program when I'm in a bad mood...

(John sits down on his couch. A sigh of frustration, hands on his temple. a couple seconds go by)

John: ...What if I fail...? What if this whole thing is just some frivolous childhood want that's not gonna make a difference...? I don't want to be here if I can't make a difference, Jack. I don't want to just exist. That's what I was doing before. This is the only thing I have, the only thing I have to make a difference...

(a couple seconds)

Jack: You will make a difference. When the time comes, you will make a difference.


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